Tuesday Tiny Tips

  • Marriage Tip- Don’t Try To Fix Your Spouse

    This is for both husbands and wives. When your spouse comes to you with a broken heart or a loss of any kind: Don’t try to fix them.

    Did I just hear an “Amen”?

    Instead of trying to fix the situation for your spouse, make sure you are being a great listener and someone whose number one goal is to “Be there” for your loved one.

    Sometimes we just need to keep our ideas to ourselves and focus on really hearing what he or she has to say and then supporting them through prayer.

    Trying to fix someone a lot of the time, backfires and causes the hurting person to shut down. We know we don’t want that, instead, we want to be a great support.

    Instead of trying to fix things, we need to be great listeners and then commit to praying for our spouse for God’s Spirit to comfort them to the core of their brokenness or loss.

    They are in the best hands when we put them in God’s hands.

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  • Marriage Tip- From My Heart To The Newly Wed

    There may be some who would wish to dispute this but I am a very firm believer that a family starts when a couple
    gets married, not when the kids are born if a couple has kids.

    Carol and I were a family as of 1 pm September 30, 1989. Our wedding was at noon.

    I say this because I know many of you reading this are newlyweds who are just getting started.

    Newlywed or not, please consider hearing what’s on my heart as I write so that you can pass this word onto newlyweds in your life.

    From my heart to the newlywed.

    You have a family now. Honor that family. Pray for God’s loving protection over that family. Look your spouse in the eyes and know that your family is worth fighting for.

    Don’t give your family leftovers. Give your very best to your family. Don’t throw your family away to chase fantasies. Realize that your family is your reality and that God is crazy about you both and you are His family.

    Live for Him and die for each other. All day long. Then get up and do it again.

    Don’t do it alone. Surround yourself with friends who will run the good race with you and not fill your head with smoke.

    Don’t do it in your own strength. Ask God to be your all-powerful provider each day.

    Don’t give up. Never give up.

    Don’t be the one who gave up on the family. Love your family. Don’t let go.

    God is doing something brand new in you. Never let go.

    Is there an exception? Yes. Never allow yourself or your loved ones to be abused. Take action if that is happening.

    Alright, I think that’s it.

    Have a great week!

    “The family is born when the betrothed conclude their sacred vows.” -B.K. Raymond (Presbyterian Evangelist)

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  • Marriage Tip- Joking About Divorce is Planting Seeds of Divorce

    My wife Carol and I joke about everything.

    When Carol got pregnant with our firstborn I teased her about getting big. We shared great laughs over this.

    Weird. Right ladies?

    Then, a year and a few months later she got pregnant with our twins.

    She got enormous.

    Carol’s girlfriends cornered me at church one morning and said, “You have got to stop teasing Carol about being big! You just don’t do that! You don’t tease a pregnant woman.

    So I stopped.

    One day a week or so later, Carol came up to me and burst into tears.

    I asked, “Honey! What’s wrong?”

    She said, “You don’t tease me anymore about being big!”

    I said, “I was told not to!”

    She asked, “By who?”

    I said, “Your girlfriends!”

    She said, “NO! I love it when you tease me!”

    I said, “Oh… well Goodyear just called and asked if you would fly over the stadium and take pictures of the game on Sunday?”

    She grabbed me with a laugh and said, “I love you!”

    True Story.

    Okay. Two things

    First: Guys, most women do not like to be teased. For that matter ladies, a lot of us guys don’t like to be teased either. DO NOT use this Tip as a license to start teasing your spouse. Carol and I do it in a very safe and loving way and we both love it. If your spouse does not like to be teased, that is normal.

    Most people don’t like to be teased.

    So why this Tip?

    Okay, second: This is the reason for the Tip. Carol and I joke about anything and everything under the moon. However…

    We NEVER joke about DIVORCE. NEVER.

    We have been married since 1989 and we have teased each other thousands of times. But never about divorce. Never.

    Teasing about Divorce is a way of planting seeds of divorce.

    My advice: Never tease about divorce. Don’t plant those seeds.

    Have a great week friends.

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  • Parenting Tip- Make Your Words Count

    Do your best to teach your kids that their words count.

    We do this by making our words count.

    When you look your kids in the eyes, make your word solid.

    Try not to use the word “promise” with your children unless you are absolutely sure you will not break it.

    Some Christians have taken the power out of the word promise by overusing it and not following through.

    “Later this afternoon we will drive over to the park, I promise.”

    The afternoon rolls around and you are feeling wiped out and you then say, “We will go tomorrow, I promise.”

    Always try not to make promises you can’t keep. Teach your children that words count.

    God keeps His promises and so we should try our best to do so as well.

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    Right Choice Communications

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